It's been so long since I posted here I barely know where to start. I read the last entry and I can't even say I remember the day clearly now but it made me a bit sad.
Against all odds I finally found a house. The whole stressfully procedure continued for a month or more before everything was finally signed and the keys were handed over. I got a fixer-upper so I didn't even have time to blog about it. I had to get to work rehabbing it just so I could live in it - it was filthy, neglected and in very sore need of everything from appliances to a new air conditioner system. Had the floors polished, the ceilings refinished, shopped second hand appliance stores and just basically spent 3 weeks there doing nothing but sweating my ass off pulling nails out of the walls, cleaning, prepping to paint, cleaning, making repairs, painting, taking bids for more repairs, cleaning and... well did I mention sweating and cleaning?
It was about the beginning of the third week that the new A/C was installed and running so the work started to get a little easier but then it was time to get to work cleaning the apartment to move out - more sweating and cleaning. Things really started to move quick that week between packing and making the final repairs to make the house functional. Gawd, it must have been another 3 weeks before I even touched the yard and that's a whole blog entry itself.
No sooner had I gotten the place moved into and my office operational when business just completely dropped dead. I mean I was thankful for the lull during the transitional month but it was pretty scary how quiet things had gotten. Suffice to say the first year was really really tight financially. I wish I could say it was one of those hard but joyful times you look back on with fondness - it wasn't. Despite my staking the place out for weeks before we signed the last offer I just had no way of knowing what a holy pain in the ass my neighbors would become - not a clue til I was there for a month. I had enjoyed getting acquainted with my genuinely diverse neighborhood, it's a very blue collar sort of neighborhood so everybody I met was so nice and down-to-earth. I started to feel right at home - I quickly sorted out the nosy gossip and the know-it-all dude and super nice couple that lives next to me but little did I know on the other side was the dysfunctional drinking/smoking/socializing family from hell. I will spare you all the ugly details (and it did get very ugly) but I will say, as much as I dislike the term they put the trash in "White Trash".
There have been a lot of ups & down this last year, my head spins just trying to remember everything. Shortly after I got settled in and back to work I found it was time to get cataract surgery - every one I saw for a week in preparation kept saying I was the youngest person they'd met with a cataract. Its not a distinction I relish but I got through the period of adjustment and back to work again. I started dating R again, we broke up again and started dating again, in fact I'm not even sure where we left off last time it's just become a normal thing for us to take time apart and reset in coping with his traveling. It's been fine for the most part, I've just spent countless hours and money I didn't have rehabbing the house and looking for new clients. I still am except business just finally started to pick up a little last month or so.
Aside from the stress of a new house and money woes the saddest time so far is when my dear dear beloved cat Tinker got out and disappeared. I didn't sleep for weeks and I looked for her so hard - flyers, posters, daily trips to the animal shelters, knocking on doors for a couple of blocks - nothing. Aside from one credible sighting a day too late there is absolutely no clue what happened to her. It was so heartbreaking because she was getting senile and she was so old. I'm told sometimes this is the way cats want to leave things when it their time but I found that rather hard to accept. Actually I am not sure what was harder - trying to keep hoping she'd come home or I'd find her or accepting she'd want to go off and die alone at her age. Finally one day when I was going on one of my nightly rounds calling for her and checking where she'd last been seen I just stopped in the middle of the street and thought about how she'd come into my life - she just showed up one day about a month after I moved into a new apartment - and it just made sense I guess. She just as easily escaped noticed the day the air condition inspector came by and slipped right back out of my life. I was only graced with her for 10 years perhaps she had work to do elsewhere?
It was just such a sad irony that it was maybe 4 months after I'd finally found us a home and she seemed so happy in the new house - there was plenty of room so her & the lil one weren't spatting as much and there were lots of big windows to peer out of and lots of cool floor or warm couch to stretch out on, plenty of place to hide if adventure struck... after fearing for her live before when she was sick, we found the house and it was such a nice time for us all... and then *poof* she was gone. That's why being at the animal shelter was a little uncomfortable today - aside from how many animals there are in need of a good home I lost my old lady and that was one of the last places I had gone in hopes of recovering her. Revisiting today I remembered what a mess I was but its not as bad as the last time I tried to think about taking home a new pet and its not as bad as having a dozen people try to push cats on me 2 days after she disappeared either
Only today can I finally honor her as I take in a new pet. Molly - a delicate lil Calico - seems to have her gentle spirit although she is no replacement. I hope she will be happy here and every year when I hang the little white kittycat-angel ornament on the tree I will still think of Tink and thank the heavens I was so blessed.
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