behind the magic eight ball.
http://www.osric.com/8ball/
p.s. I hate the new client. I worked on this package correction — it seemed simple enough although it took me a little time, I did exactly what the go-between asked for and then got a terse, snotty reply from the end client.... first project ever... snotty (the nice word for it) reply... and, huh, yeah, gotta say the future doesn't look bright. I mean demanding is one thing, detailed oriented is one thing, needling and being set on not being happy and expressing that passively aggressively is another — great can't wait for more!!! Nothing to do with pride, don't care about him, I just need the money and I was hoping I could feel good about it helping us both while I pay off the tax stuff but from the looks of things I'm not sure it;s going to be worth the effort or the mood it will put me in to put up with the crap — none of my other clients take that tone, that's why I freelance: everybody implicitly understands I am not there to take crappy attitude and it will cost you... and alternately, probably the reason they hire freelancers exclusively and don't have any references: no body likes them.
Then I got home and re-read notes on another job (to paraphrase two pages of type written notes) — "it's great, she loves it, now change everything." Sigh, predictable. It's not a problem the client wants to change everything — it is THEIR piece of marketing magic — I just don't understand what if anything she likes that I am really supposed to keep and I'd rather dispense with the nicety of smoke up my butt if there is nothing she likes. I mean I would rather literally hear "responded well to over all color palette and fonts but start over with everything else" because I feel like no matter what I do to get her what works (not much of which in the notes works together) I'll walk back in to "what? Why'd ya do that??? she liked XYX now it's all gone"... it's not great expectations, it's a &#*%'ing Rubic's Cube of compound client expectation.
Sigh, I feel like I've been running around all week and have gotten nothing productive done. I mean, I feel completely unsatisfied with life, I have no idea what to do to fix it and I feel like I am coming down with something... hmmm, maybe it is that same psychosomatic something I come down with whenever people sneeze on me and office equipment we all have to share. Oh, the missed joys of being in an office environment! I was liking being around people during the day but then I realized - you know in the years I have worked for myself I haven't been sick with a cold or flu in over 3 years of working from home. Tooth ache, root canal, implant surgery, the difficult extraction, horrid dry root pain, ruminating hormonal hell, the stomach thing and the odd mild migraine but not a cold or the flu in over 3 years.
Anyway, half way to a whiney tired/emotional crying fit that the cats never ever understand it dawned on me there is nothing to "fix" — I mean there probably something that needs fixing in Rwanda and I could be doing more even in my own little corner of the globe, certainly even in my own little life but... I dunno, I just had one of those moments where I wished someone would show up with chicken soup and a hug but I would actually be fine. I think the task orientation just covers for there not being that someone to help heal me when I hurt... I wonder if that's why Workaholic is a workaholic - because his seems even more of an active avoidance of there ever being room for someone to be there to begin with.... later after getting a decaf mocha to pacify me and much later after not sleeping very well some of the answers appeared — I'm not going to that dinner party with the background story I can't tell the hostess, I'm not seeing the friend in town that I don't want to see who is just going to drill me on who I am or am not dating, I will call the UPS guy who gave me his number and I will address that unfinished business with that other "friend" who is always too flippin' busy to really talk about something that I deserve an explanation for and then I'm just gonna let it go whatever it is and get on with my life... and you know what else I'm gonna do? Back out of the independent contracting deal with the print shop I've been friends with for years if that client proves to be the ass I think he is.
